A little catch up.

It has been a minute since I've published a blog. I'm really sorry about that.

I've been busy prepping for the holidays, and getting back into the swing of life.

 The last week or so has been really hard for me. I'm constantly worried that I'm eating too much, even though I've measured everything out.

It's such a mental process, and it's really a struggle. I don't really crave anything that I'm not supposed to have. It's more so that I feel like I'm failing my diet.

 The reality is that I should probably be eating more than I am. I'm not meeting my protein requirements, no matter how hard I try.

 I've just recently ordered some supplements in hopes that they'll get my protein intake up.

 I guess we'll see.

I unfortunately ended up in the emergency room yesterday.

For the last 30 hours or so, I haven't been able to keep anything down, and the nurse practitioner at St. Francis said that I needed to go to the E.R.

So I did.

They ran a ct scan with contrast, and drew some blood work

Come to find out, my surgery sight is healing perfectly.

The only thing that they found was a UTI.

Said that it was quite possible that I have a stomach virus and need to let it run its course.

So that's what I'm doing.

Other than that, I can say that I have officially lost 45 pounds.

Which is crazy.

It's only been three weeks since my surgery and I'm down almost fifty pounds.

I'll take it.

 

I have a feeling that I'm about to hit a weight loss stall.

I have to mentally prepare myself for those.

Hopefully increasing my protein intake, and water intake will eventually help me break the stall.

I'll just have to wait and see.

 

I go for my 6 week checkup with my surgeon the week after Christmas. Hopefully, she will clear me to start working out so that I can start toning up.

I think that is the hardest part about having surgery so far.

I'm just rapidly losing weight, and seeing my skin start to sag.

Thankfully, my surgeon said that once I start toning, it should tighten up pretty quickly.

So, I'm ready to start that process.

 

 

On another note, can you believe that Christmas is next week?!

It's been so hard for me to get into the holiday mood due to the fact that it's like 95 degrees outside. However, I'm trying to make the most of it.

I'm so excited to give everyone their Christmas gifts! I seriously can't wait.

I love Christmas. It just sucks that it feels like spring outside.

Oh well, Tis the Season.

I get to have some Christmas fun with my family this weekend, and I'm thrilled about it!

It's always nice to have everyone together.

 

Now that I have settled back in to normal life, I should be blogging more often.

Thanks to those who have made an effort to call, text, message, and email me to check in on me. It means a lot.

And to those of you who are requesting some pictures,

I'll have some up soon.

 

Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays to you and yours from me.

I hope that you all get to enjoy stress free time with your loved ones this holiday season.

 

-Baby

 

 

 

 

The Journey Starts Now.

Hello, lovely people!!
I hope that your holiday has been wonderful! Mine has been great! I've spent a lot of my time laying around and trying to heal up some.
I thought it would be nice to let you know that I've lost 25 pounds!! Woohoo!!
I can't lie to you guys and say that it's been easy.
Everyday I tell my mom that I wish I could have something to eat.
You know, you would think that Thanksgiving day would have been the hardest on me.
It wasn't.
It's these days after.
Where I'm with my family and they're all eating good, Mexican food.
All I've had were protein shakes, and some yogurt.
No wonder I've lost weight, huh?
Honestly, I've already had moments where I've wanted to go back.
I'm in pain from the actual procedure and I can't eat anything.
I can't lie and say that I've enjoyed this.
I haven't.
I'm ready for some food.
Literally everyone is eating everything.
& i'm having a shake.
I keep trying to tell myself that it'll be worth it, and sometimes I know that it will be.
I have 5 weeks before I can have a solid meal, and I will probably be ready to tear someone's hair out.
On a brighter note, in another 5 weeks, I'll be able to start hitting the gym and seeing some hardcore results.
It's been a really emotional 7 days.
I am 100% ready to go back to work.
I'm so sick of laying around the house.
I get to start back on Wednesday, and I'm so ready to see everyone.
I think that maybe this will get easier once I'm busy and have my mind on other stuff.
I know that I will get past the hard days, and that it will be worth it.
I just have to get to that point.
Please continue to keep me in your prayers as I navigate my way through these next weeks.
Pray that I don't bite someone's head off.
Literally.
Sorry for these posts that seem all over the place. Like I've said. I've been very emotional lately.
Someday soon, my blog posts will be of good recipes, and they'll all make since.
Until then, bare with me.

-Baby

Day 2

It feels really weird to be blogging from a hospital.

 However, I am thankful that I am feeling well enough to sit up and blog. I told everyone that I came in contact with yesterday that I did NOT want to be drugged out of my mind the whole time that I was here. I've mostly had Tylenol, but I've also had a couple doses of Dilauded. Of course, those knocked me out immediately. I finally got to put my own clothes on, and brush my teeth. I feel like a whole new person. 

The pain is tolerable. I had a pretty rough night last night, between the pain and the nurses coming in every four hours to take blood and check vitals. I ended up needing some Dilauded which put me straight to sleep. I got up this morning and walked the hospital, I swear that walking has become my best friend. It helps alleviate the gas pain. The gas pain is the worst part. During a laparoscopic procedure, they expand your stomach with gas in order to get your organs off of each other so that they can work easier. It feels like trapped gas in my chest, and it hurts oh so bad. But walking fixes everything. Ha.

I can't start working out hardcore until 6 weeks out. That kind of upsets me because I'm ready to start working out, but I don't want to cause a hernia. So I'll just stick with walking for now.

I found out yesterday that I lost 15 pounds on my liver shrink diet!! So, that was exciting. I woke up this morning, and I'm pretty sure that I've lost more since the procedure yesterday. 

A lot of people keep asking me why I decided to have the procedure before Thanksgiving. The truth is, I didn't even realize it was right before Thanksgiving, until like a week after it was scheduled. That being said, I was ready for this change. I knew that I wanted to be completely healed up by my birthday in January, and I wanted to start losing weight by Christmas, so it all worked out. No, I won't be able to eat solids on Thanksgiving, but I will be able to travel to be with my family on Thanksgiving, and I am very excited about that. I will also be able to shop that weekend, so needless to say, I don't think I will be missing out on the food.

 I'll be strictly on liquids until two weeks out, and I will slowly start reintroducing some thicker foods and solids into my diet. I will be able to eat anything that I want (within reason) at 6 weeks out.  I will also be able to shop that weekend, so needless to say, I don't think I will be missing out on the food. I have mentally prepared myself well for this new season of my life, and I am glad to know that it will all be worth it.

 I'm so sorry that this post is all over the place. There was no one topic that I was interested in writing about. I just wanted to let you guys know that I am doing well, with minimal pain. Please continue to pray for a quick healing and smooth recovery. Thanks guys!

-Baby

Sink or Swim

This. Is. Happening. 

Tomorrow to be exact. The first day of the rest of my life is happening tomorrow.

 And I’m scared to death. I feel like that is 100% normal, though. I go in for my procedure at 8 am in the morning. I have this weird antibacterial soap that I have to wash with, and I really want a cheeseburger. But I’m doing okay. I’ll be in the hospital for two days afterward, just to make sure that everything is going okay. I’ve been doing the liver shrink diet for the last two weeks, and it hasn’t been as hard as I’ve expected it to be. I had one really hard day where I was craving something sweet, but I got through it. I am on only clear liquids today, but that is just getting me prepared for tomorrow. This surgery can be dangerous when you have solid food in your system, so they make you do clear liquids before the surgery.

 I’ve spent the majority of my day wondering how I can be this scared and this excited at the same time. I wondered how it was like I could be so ready and so intimidated at the same time. I wondered how I would make it through these first few months. The months that most people tend to have an issue with. The ones who can transition into a depression, and gastric bypass patients don’t even know what is happening. What would I do? Me. The person who fought and scraped to beat depression. What would happen if I fell back into that place? I immediately thought, “Sink or Swim”. Those are the choices that I have. It’s just like the first time I ever swam solely on my own. I remember my dad letting go of me and saying, “sink or swim”. In these new waters that I will be testing, it’s sink or swim. My surgeon is handing me this tool on a silver platter. The only thing that I can do is use it to its full potential. 

I never pictured myself in this position. I never thought that I would be awaiting a surgery to help me turn my life around. But I also never thought I’d get to a place where I was anxiety free. Where I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’m ready to be comfortable with myself, and to run 5 k’s, and to be excited about clothes shopping. Most of all, I’m ready to be healthy. Healthier than I have ever been. A place where I never thought I would be. Healthy.

I am asking for prayers. Prayers not only for God to calm my fears, but also that he would guide my surgical team. I can’t wait to start this journey. It all is becoming so so real to me. I can’t wait to see what life is like on the other side. Again, thanks to those who are actually following along and read these. It means the world.

                                                                         

  -Baby

Change, Change, Change.

Change is inevitable. Change is constant. -Benjamin Disraeli

So, it’s official. My entire life is changing. The change began with the approval of my weight loss surgery, and continued to make its way into my educational life. From there, I’ve been hired on at an animal hospital! I am so stoked! I can’t tell you how excited I am to have my entire life changed in the course of three weeks. It has definitely kept me on my toes. Want to know something funny? Since the beginning of these changes, I haven’t taken one anxiety pill. Not one. It’s crazy, because a lot of people say that with chaos comes heightened anxiety. Believe me, my life is definitely chaotic. But when I decided to make myself happy, and stop doing what everyone else wanted me to do, I didn’t feel so anxious all the time. I feel free for the first time in a long time. It’s nice. It really is.

So, now with updates about my surgery. I had a follow up appointment with The West Clinic about my blood work. Dr. Weaver sent me to Dr. Somers to make sure that I didn’t have any blood clotting disorders. I went this afternoon and found that my blood work came back completely normal. Yay! Now I can proceed with the steps to my surgery. The next step is the liver shrink diet. You have to be on this diet for some time before the surgery, and you have to follow it strictly. The point of the diet is that removes the fat that has built up around the liver, so that it is easier to maneuver the arms of the machine so that they can perform the surgery successfully. So, that means that I’ll be eating nothing but protein bars, and eating nothing but protein shakes. Delicious. I’m pretty excited about it, actually. A lot of people say that this diet jump starts weight loss. The average person loses 20-30 pounds in this time span. I’ll start preparing the stuff for that diet tomorrow. I have one more appointment before I have my surgery, but the appointment is later this month.

Sadly, tomorrow will be day one without sodas. Nothing but water for the next several months. If you know me at all, you know that this is probably going to be the hardest part of the journey for me. I drink Dr. Pepper like it is going out of style. So, there’s that. Me and crystal light are about to become best friends forever.

A lot of people have asked me about before pictures, and how often I would be taking pictures to show progress. Before, during, and after pictures are something that I was interested in for myself. But a lot of you have voiced your interest in them. So this is me asking all of you if you would like to see before, during and after pictures. They will not be half naked pictures where I expose myself to the world, because I’m a classy girl and that’s just not my thang, ya feel me? If you are interested in the pictures, just comment on my Facebook post of today’s blog and let me know how often you’d want picture updates (every month, three months, etc).

I am getting pretty close to my surgery date, guys. I’m both excited and nervous, and I am asking for prayers. Not only prayers to calm my nerves, but also prayers that God will guide the doctor’s hands. Thanks for following me in this journey. There’s more to me than you know.

                                                                 -Bypass Baby

UPDATES!!!

So, it has been a minute since I’ve updated you guys. Sorry! But there have been a lot of changes that have taken place all at once. First I’ll update you about my procedure! Things have come along very quickly! I do have a ball park surgery date; However, I don’t want to put anything out there because it isn’t set in stone. I can openly say that I have my psychological evaluation on Thursday, and this is the last thing that I will have to do in order to have the hospital clear me for surgery. I am seriously so ready for this life change, guys! I can’t explain to you how blessed I feel that I am able to do this. It is so surreal, and I feel as if someone has wrapped a new life in a box and handed it to me. I’m ready for this change.

Secondly, I would like to address some other questions and comments that I have repeatedly gotten from people regarding my procedure. “You’re taking the easy way out.” Oh, okay – because having my stomach stapled off to the size of an egg and having my intestines rerouted is easy. Thank you, kind sir for thinking that this process will make me skinny in ten and a half seconds. No. This procedure aids me in weight loss (as I have said a million times), IT DOES NOT IN ANY WAY GUARANTEE THAT I WILL NOT GAIN IT BACK. Hence, the lifestyle change part. A lot of people think that this is just going to fix every problem ever. I will be learning how to eat in portion sizes, I will be learning how not to binge eat because I have had a bad day. However, if you still think that I am taking the easy way out after you have read the above statements, that’s okay. Because I have always been told to work smarter, not harder.
“Are you not worried about hanging, sagging skin?” I’ll be honest with you. I was worried about that at first. I spoke with my dietician last week and voiced my concern, she told me that if I worked out while I was losing the weight that I should not have any issue with hanging skin because of my age. I plan on beginning weight lifting and resistance training as soon as my surgeon clears me. So, I should be fine with the skin issue.
"Why can’t you lose the weight through diet and exercise?” Honey, I have tried everything. Atkins, Low Carb Low Fat, Paleo, Clean Eating, Vegetarian/Vegan, Weight Watchers, Calorie Counting. I. Have. Literally. Tried. Everything. I also have PCOS, and I have recently found out that there is something wrong with my thyroid. So, there’s that. If you’re one of those people that it going to message me privately and suggest that I try one more time before doing something so extreme, you can save it (in the nicest way possible). I have literally tried everything. Thanks for your concern. 😊
~

On to another announcement that I have been sitting on for a while. I am just going to bluntly put it out there, so hold on to your panties!! I have decided to leave nursing school for the time being. I know that this is something that I have put a lot of time, money, and effort in. I thank all of you that have supported me in all of my educational endeavors, and I hope that you will continue to support me in the next stage of my life. I have decided to go to cosmetology school. Yes, I know that this is a HUGE step in a different direction. I know that the salaries are completely different. I have weighed the options for a while, and I feel that this is the best step for me. Those of you who know me know that I am the odd ball in my family. I have always changed the way that I look, and dress. I am obsessed with makeup and hair tutorials, and I love meeting people. I am excited about this next step in my life. I am hoping to establish myself, and then maybe open a salon. I understand if I lose supporters in this next step in my life, because it is such a change from what I was doing.

I hope that you can all continue to support me and pray for me as I pursue the path that is unraveling before me. There is nothing that I embrace more than change. Change shows us who we are, and I hope to be all that I believe that I am.

<3, bypass baby

My Name is Lindsey, and I'm Having Gastric Bypass.

"Do you actually want to go through with this?" This is literally the question that I've been asked over and over again since I've decided to go ahead with this surgery. YES, I'M SURE.

 "Are you even sure that you're big enough to have this surgery?" Fellas, have you seen me? I'm plenty big. Not to say that I don't love my body, and not to say that I don't rock every measly piece of clothing that I put on. What I am saying is, I WOULD LOVE TO BE HEALTHY.

Wait, what? You mean to tell me that there are overweight people out there that care enough about themselves, and those around them to change their way of living so that they can be around longer? UH.yeah. 

I have already encountered people in this very short journey that I have been on that have decided to tell me that they disagree with the decision that I have made. Which is fine. They are human, and they are allowed to have an opinion. 

Most humans do.

With that being said, I would like you to know that if you're reading this blog right now, I care enough about you to explain to you that I am not jumping head first into a surgery that is going to change the rest of my life all because I want that pair of shorts from "The Body Shop" in the WolfChase mall. I have done TONS of research on this journey -- post op and pre op, and I have decided that this is going to be a positive change in my life. 

This change is going to allow me to run 5ks without embarrassment, it's going to give me the confidence that I need to excel in my career (because I mean, if you go to a doctor that tells you to lose weight, and they're unhealthy, would you want to listen? No.) More importantly, this surgery is going to HELP me get healthy. Help is the keyword. I know that this surgery is only going to do what I want it to do if I can learn how to control myself. The surgery is only a tool that I can use. It does not prevent me from gaining weight back, it just helps me lose the weight I want to lose. 

Now that we have that out of the way, a lot of people have asked me what surgery I am having, what the process is, and how long will it be until I have my surgery.

Firstly, I have done months of research on each of the surgeries and have come to the conclusion that the Roux-en-y Gastric Bypass procedure is going to be the best one for me. I will copy and paste the definition in layman's terms down below. Before you read it and freak out on me, you should know that this surgery is reversible, and that it has the best results.

"Gastric bypass surgery refers to a surgical procedure in which the stomach is divided into a small upper pouch and a much larger lower "remnant" pouch and then the small intestine is rearranged to connect to both. Surgeons have developed several different ways to reconnect the intestine, thus leading to several different gastric bypass (GBP) procedures. Any GBP leads to a marked reduction in the functional volume of the stomach, accompanied by an altered physiological and physical response to food." (Wikipedia)

The process of having the surgery varies by insurance company/method of payment. Luckily, I have been blessed and my insurance company will cover the procedure. I have to have three months of showing the insurance company that I have tried other methods of weight loss, and I have to go through some psychological evaluations so that I can prove to them that I will be able to take care of myself after surgery. This process can take a couple of months to get everything together, and I will be updating on my journey. 

We are hoping and praying that I can have the procedure done in December while I am on Christmas break so that I don't have to miss class in order to heal. However, the December date is adjustable, and is not set in stone. Merry Christmas to me!! Amiright?

You should all know that I am very exciting about the changes that are about to take place for me. I wouldn't be hear without God's grace and blessings on my life. I would appreciate it if everyone kept their NOT SO VERY NICE OPINIONS to themselves, as this is something that my parents and I have discussed and prayed about and we feel that God has made a way when there was no way at all. I would also appreciate your thoughts, prayers, and good vibes as I continue this journey. I also hope that you are interested enough to follow me as my life begins to change. I love each one of you and would like to thank you for taking the time to read this and rejoice with me!!

P.S. I'm changing my name to "Bypass Baby"  ;)

Thanks for reading!